Tea Stash

Posted on January 16, 2012 by amoment2think

So Amber (@amberstrocel) wanted to know who had the biggest tea stash. Tea has been a hot topic on twitter recently. Probably because it is cold, rainy and everyone needs a warm cuppa.

I do not have the biggest tea stash. If you had asked me last fall before we moved from Calgary to New Westminster, I might have been in the top 10% of tea stashes. But when we moved I cleared a lot of my tea stash out. The less we could move the better.

I also found there were a lot of teas I just wasn’t drinking. So they sat there and sat there. And old tea is just not good. Besides that, I really try to keep my cupboards full of only stuff we regularly use.

When we moved out here we brought a few teas with us. My husband (@frenchpressme) was involved in choosing the tea menu for the Fratello cafe at the Calgary Farmers market- so we had some really awesome tea samples from that. I also learned pretty quickly where to get the best Tea in New Westminster; The Great Wall Tea Company. (You can also find them on twitter: @greatwalltea) Essentially, we don’t have all that many teas, but the ones we have are REALLY REALLY good.

Here is out at home stash.

In the picture you see:

Back Left to Right: Great Wall black tea, I think it is called Bukhail or Bukkail (hand written, I can’t tell); Green Wall green tea called Hojicha; Roobios tea from Idle (I love making Red tea lattes in the winter and iced Roobios with juice in the summer); Assorted herbal tea from Mighty Leaf.

Also at the back right you will see the BEST contraption for brewing loose leaf tea. It’s called a BREWT and essentially you put the loose leaf tea and water in and then once it is steeped you put it on top of your mug or pot and it drains from the bottom so there are no leaves in your tea. Awesome. I also have a smaller version from an other company that I keep at work.

Front left to right: Great Wall Tea Black Pumpkin Spice in the mason jar; Great Wall Tea Green tea called Kuhicha; AND Great Wall Tea Arbo Grey. Arbo Grey is a specially blend of cream earl grey and 20% lavender that @jenarbo invented and you can get only at Great Wall Tea. It is amazing. Go buy some.

I also have a tea stash at work. It looks like this:

It includes (left to right): Chai, Breakfast Tea, Honey n’ Cream- All from Assam Tea.

Then my Teaopia tea press, just like the one we have at home. And a small travel container of my very favourite “Arbo Grey” tea (mentioned above).

Now, there are still a few teas I would like to get. I need some Chai for home. I love Chai, a lot, and I know I would brew it up at home if I had some there. I also need to get some of my favourite green tea. It is called Genmaicha and is green tea with roasted rice. I love it! I am also currently without a good English Breakfast tea, which is an other one of my favourites. A couple more really good herbal teas would be nice too. So I may need to take a trip to Great Wall Tea and splurge one of these days to complete my collection.

But there you have it, my tea stash!

*Just like Amber, I am not receiving any compensation from any of the tea companies mentioned in this post. I am just sharing what I like.

Struggling to Play with my Toddler

Posted on January 13, 2012 by amoment2think

I am sure I have said this before. I think some parents are great baby parents. Some parents are great toddler parents. Some parents are great with preschoolers or school age kids and some shine with teenagers. Given that we are all human beings with strengths and weaknesses, this makes sense.

I think I have also mentioned before that I believe I am a ‘school age parent’. I’m not sure, because, you know, I don’t have a school aged kid, I just have a toddler. But what I do know for sure is that the baby/toddler stage is not where I shine.

Now that’s not to say I don’t think I am a good parent. Despite all the blame the mother messages, guilt over this choice or that, pressure to be the perfect mom and all the other things our society heaps on us as parents that makes this parenting job OH SO MUCH MORE DIFFICULT, I actually believe I am a pretty good parent. I am loving, kind, reasonably consistent, reasonably effective with dealing with problem behaviour, and good at being aware of my individual kid and her individual needs and responding as such.

But. I still don’t feel ‘at home’ in the toddler years. They are better then the ‘baby’ stage, where I felt horribly inadequate and lost, but I still don’t feel I am ‘great’ at the toddler stage.

blocks 300x230 Struggling to Play with my Toddler

photo by Hey Paul via Flickr Creative Commons

One of the main reasons is that I really struggle with engaging in toddler play. There, I said it. This one is hard for me to admit guys, because I feel bad about it. How could I not know how to play with my kid? How can anyone not know how to play?

I just don’t. Sort of. There are parts of it I am good at. I am happy to have lengthy conversations with Audrey, letting her take the lead and letting the conversation twist and turn and repeat, as she asks the same questions over and over again and practices that odd toddler cyclical logic. That’s fun, because wow does she come up with some hilarious things. I love reading to her and taking her to the park. I am even happy to put on some music and have a dance off. But when she asks me to draw with her or build lego or play house… I can do it… but its just not fun to me. I get bored quickly and that imaginative play just doesn’t come naturally to me. I just want to go back to knitting or whatever.

Some parents seem to be naturals at coming up with games and activities and crafts to do with their kids. Fun ideas to fill up a rainy day. My brain just doesn’t function that way. I’d rather get in the car and go on an adventure to try and find somewhere (anywhere) indoor for her to play. I’d rather her colour or pretend to cook or play with her puzzles on her own, rather then get down on the floor with her. Oh, that sounds horrible. See! Its hard not to feel like a bad mom for admitting this!

But I know I am not a bad Mom. I am an imperfect human. And my kid will not be ruined for life because I am not good at making up games and engaging in imaginative play. (Also, my wonderful husband who is an amazing Dad is great at this, so you know, its not like A is depending totally on me for this.) It’s how I am built- I have always lived more in the world of ideas then in the world of fantasy. My greatest fear is being put on the spot and asked to do something creative. I like concrete goals and things with a clear beginning, middle and end. Imaginative play was never my strong suit- I always preferred to read a book. I can be creative when coming up with solutions to problems, but other then that, my creative side is lacking. At least that is how it feels to me.

I think one of the hardest things we encounter as a parent is to make peace with our imperfections and the ways in which we aren’t always the ‘perfect’ parent. A couple people have tried to encourage me to embrace my (non existent) “silly side” and just get down on the floor and play. I’ve tried and I will continue to try, but it will never be my strength. Send me in to deal with a tantrum- sure, that I can do. It’s not fun, but I feel much more able to do that then to make up a toddler ‘game’ to play.

But I can’t be the only parent out there that feels like this. Right? There have to be other Left Brain dominant individuals out there that find this equally challenging. Or maybe there is an other aspect of being the ‘perfect’ parent that you struggle with? I figure we all must have our things, right?

I have no idea how to end this post. Confession made. Guilt exposed. Attempt to partially accept my own foibles partially successful. I guess.

Really, I think this is just a call out there to the rest of the parenting world– none of us are perfect, right? Anyone want to join in and confess their foibles?

The Grandparent Effect

Posted on January 11, 2012 by amoment2think

One of the biggest changes in our lives since we moved from Calgary to New Westminster is that we have a lot more family close by. This is a very very good thing for many reasons. One of them is that Audrey can go and spend time with Grandparents and we can get a break. And through December, due to Audrey’s day home being closed, our family did a lot of child care. Thank the heavens- we couldn’t done it without them.

The way things work out, we had a number of great breaks over the last couple months, where Audrey was literally away for either one night or multiple nights at a time. Essentially, we had a couple periods ranging from 24 hours to 4 or 5 days where husband and I were 100% child free.

I can’t tell you how luck we are that we have this. I get that this is not the norm- many parents, even ones with family in town, don’t have the easy going kid that we have who is quite happy to have a grandparent put her to bed. I know when I told my colleagues that we were sending Audrey over to the Island my parents live on for 5 days, they were shocked that Audrey would be okay with that. So it is the combination of really great parents and a really adaptable child that makes this all possible. Again, I count us as lucky.

But, reality is, there is a downside to these breaks. And I bring it up here not to complain about what is otherwise a very good situation. I bring it up because it says something very interesting about toddlers. I’m going to call it the Grandparent Effect. It goes something like this.

Audrey goes to Grandparent(s) house. She has a good time. She is a little charmer who is pretty well behaved. Children always behave better for someone other then their parents.

Husband and I get a break. But then we start to miss her like crazy. Crazy enough that all I want to do is go and get her, scoop her up in my arms and read her a book while cuddling on the couch. I quickly forget the two year old challenges- whinnying, crying, complaining that we gave her the wrong cup, frustration over her refusal to use the potty (that’s an other post). All that is forgotten and I just want to chat with her about her day.

So then we go to get her. And the minute she is within two feet of me she turns into a whiny, clingy mess! Not at all the reunion I pictured. She asks me to colour with her and then freaks out when I don’t do it right. She cry’s, wants me to carry her around and generally makes me want to turn around and run out the door.

What I have come to realize though is that this is 100% normal and to be expected. At least for my kid. The reality of the situation is is that no matter how adaptable and easy going she is, Mommy and Daddy is where she feels more safe. And if she spends prolonged time without Mommy and Daddy a certain amount of stress and tension builds up, emotions that she can’t express. So instead of saying to us when we get there, “Mommy, Daddy, I knew you would come back but I missed you and that made me sad”, she flips out and becomes the most clingy toddler ever.

Now some would probably say that if a situation causes her a certain amount of stress and tension, then that situation should be avoided. I disagree. I think part of childhood is learning that one can handle being out of ones comfort zone just fine. And besides that, I think the memories of fun times with Grandparents is one of the best joys of childhood- and that’s worth missing Mom and Dad occasionally.

I have come to realize that toddlers behaviour is often defined by the emotions they can’t process or express. Tired, hungry, confused, overwhelmed- all of these come out in that toddlers emotional release method of choice. Crying, whinnying, temper tantrums, whatever works for that kid.

And while I “get” it, that doesn’t make it any easier. Clingy/Whinyness is probably the behaviour I struggle with the most as a parent. It bothers me, even when I know it shouldn’t. I get it’s normal, I get why she does it, but I really really don’t like it. Especially when I just spend the last 24 hours missing her and all I want to do is get a glimpse of those “golden” parental moments. Those fun, cuddly, laughing times where you feel nothing but “my child is the best child in the whole wide world”.

But those times come. After the unexpressed emotions flow out and routine is re-established. I just have to have a little patience. And remember that being a toddler isn’t as easy as it seems.

photo1 e1326309638606 225x300 The Grandparent Effect

Making Pancakes with Papa

A New Year

Posted on January 2, 2012 by amoment2think

So apparently New Years Resolutions are out of style. At least in some circles. But I like them. I like writing down, expressing and focusing with a few key phrases of what I want to do this year.

Now I get it that 2012 is, as @torturedpotato expresses, is just a collection of dates. (Awesome post by the way my friend!) So if I want something fro 2012, then its me that has to do the doing to get the something. You know? Hence the value of resolutions. Now, sure, I could make a resolution for a year on April 3 or Oct 11 or any other day, but January 1st just seems such a logical day to make resolutions.

Oh, wait, it’s January 2nd? Oh well, sorry about that. You see I was on a Ferry yesterday and I am battling this wicked cold and you know….

Better late then never.

Resolutions:

1) Learn how to make Pho

I freakin’ love Pho. And when I get a Pho craving… I just NEED it. (Pho =Vietnamese Noddle Soup AKA the CURE FOR ALL THINGS). And sure, living in the Lower Mainland there are lots of places to get Pho fast and cheap, but I want to learn how to make my own Pho. So that I can freeze the broth and always have some on hand for impromptu Pho cravings. Anyone willing to lend me their Vietnamese Grandma for a cooking lesson?

Photo by LWY via Flickr Creative Commons

2) Walk more

Every year I resolve to get fit. One year, right before my wedding, I did it. But most years I don’t. I keep trying to ‘fit’ a workout into my busy schedule and it’s just not working for me. So instead, I am going to resolve to walk more. Take the long route. Walk instead of drive whenever possible. Walk Audrey to Day Home on nice days. If I can fit in even 45 minutes- an hour of walking a day, that would make a big difference.

3) Worry less about money

The reality is, that I spent a lot of 2011 worrying about money. The reality also is that we have a lot more then a lot of other people. We are very lucky and in no way hard done by. Really, not being able to take out cash for extra’s for a week or two- this is not the end of the world. We can pay our bills, we can keep food on our table and clothing on our backs. We are lucky. I need to except that we are tight on our budget and stop worrying about it. That doesn’t mean keep spending, that just means stop worrying. Money is not worth worrying about.

4) Not feel guilty when I don’t blog

I started this blog as a way to express myself. And in the two years I have been doing it is has gone up and down in terms of traffic, comments and engagement. For various reasons I am sure. But I need to get back to the core reasons why I write- for me. Not that you guys don’t matter- it is just that I never set out to be a ‘popular’ blog. So why am I beating myself up for not doing what I need to do to build the traffic here? I know I don’t have the time to read and comment on a hundred other blogs and post every other day and find new ways to promote my blog. And while I love reading others blogs, the part I really enjoy is writing. Just writing. So in 2012 that is my goal. I am going to write when and what I want to write. That’s it. Anything else is icing on the cake.

5) Finish the blanket my Grandmother started crocheting for me

About 6 months ago, my parents came back from visiting my Grandparents in Ontario. With them, they brought a crocheted Afghan that my Gran has started making for me, but found she couldn’t finish. Her eyesight is going and, well, she is 89 years old. So my Mom brought it back and was going to finish it for me. While on Salt Spring, my Mom taught me how to finish it instead. So I am going to finish my own blanket. Then I will have a blanket that my Grandma, Mom and I have all put stitches into and that is meaningful to me. Maybe I can get Audrey to do at least one stitch too!

Best Wishes to everyone in 2012! Warmth and Peace to you all!